11/02/2010

A mother's tear

I still cant believe that i am a mummy now. As every mother wish all the best for their child, so do I.
During my pregnancy i always want breastfeed my baby when he is born.
The day he was born, i tried to breastfeed him but failed because my milk still not came out yet.
I tried again the next day, but still failed. So he has to depend on formula milk. the day 4, i realised that my milk actually comes out, i tried again to breastfeed him but he refused. I was so sad. yes i am said and thought that he maybe already confused with my milk and the formula. Later after that, my aunt told me, he cant breastfeed because i actually have inverted n*pple. Yess, i have big b**bs but no (flat) n*pple? I am so SAD. I only learn that i have this inverted n*pple when i give birth and i actually showing to my aunt my breast. Sebelum ni kan mana mau kasi tgk urang..malu2.
So the nurse suggested to pump my milk. And to shorten the story, my milk only comes so little. I pump my milk frequently so that my baby can get antibody from mum's milk. and he has to depend on formula...i am so sad that i cant breastfeed him. Yess, i actually crying when i think of this. it is my dream to breastfeed him from the beginning, but because of my inverted n*pple he cant. I am so jealous to those who can breastfeed their baby. And i'm so pity with my Caelan who depend on formula milk from the beginning and he breastfeed my milk from the bottle.

10 comments:

StellaClaire said...

wat to do kan.. but at least he can consume the milk u pumped kan..walaupun sikit, asalkan ada ba..:)

Dont worry aa.. :)
take care of urself..

Claire Cassandra T said...

dui gia~ so sad to hear...

nc said...

jgn sedih2..yg penting baby n momy sihat :) tke care :)

Gallivanter said...

Pardon my ignorance, but isn't there any way to remedy the inverted nipple?

Vienne said...

Stella, claire and Nc: thanx for ur concern

Gallivanter: yes there is. i supposed to urut2 during my pregnancy but i dunno that i have inverted nipple until i give birth.

KenMAHD said...

Mommy Caelan,

Adaka kelas penyusuan ibu yg kana ajar tu kasi susu baby EVENTHOUGH inverted nipples. Mine sebelah non inverted sebelah inverted..tp dpt jg dia nenen yg inverted..sblm ko kasi nenen tu kasi tarik2 tu nipple dulu dia pandai panjang jg tu..

lets say inda blh jg..u hv to pump..at first klu ko pump tu mmg sikit ja kuar or langsung nda kuar..apa yg sa buat was perah guna tangan dulu..sa perah for about 1-2 weeks then bila bnyk btl sda susu sa baru sa beli machine breast pump ni...siap sa smpn dlm fridge lg tu susu2 semua..i hv to do that sebab baby sa kuning ni..i'll blog about it so that everyone get to know the experience..dun worry mommy dear..mmg gitula cabaran tu..belum lg klu nipple yg luka2..ouch.. ^__^ bah u take care ya :)

Annie said...

How's the breastfeeding now? Improved ody ka?

Vienne said...

Mrs graig: Sa kasi pump saja skrng ni..yg sebelah flat btul..yg sebelah nda cukup panjang..baby nangis ni kalau mau isap2 sebab xda dapat nenen sama teda yg masuk mulut dia...kalau sa perah baru ada mo kuar..lgpun tu susu sikit saja walau perah balik2..tp sa perah mana2 saja yg dapat la..

Annie: Macam tu saja la...ada kuar sikit2 saja tp sa cuba saja kasi perah

PENAGRAFI said...

Congrats with the new born. Being a mommy is wonderful. We're sure u gonna have fun through your journey! :-)

TaQuiLa said...

yang penting...both of u are healthy!

don't worry so much k clare..

send regards to ur son..